When it comes to romance, the Bong man is a stellar success. And here are the reasons that make a Bengali man the best boyfriend/lover/husband you will ever come across
The Bengali man – the bhodrolok, has forever been a polarising character. Some love him ardently and some scoff at his many idiosyncrasies. But when it comes to the romance, the Bong man is a stellar success. And here are the reasons that make a Bengali man the best boyfriend/lover/husband you will ever come across (or maybe have to yourself, if you’re a lucky lady!)
- THE GENUINE NICE GUY
A Bengali man is probably the perfect specimen of the NICE GUY. He is chivalrous, considerate, caring and is never aggressive with his dame. He can be found regularly holding the door open for his lady (and 5 other people who follow quickly after) at malls, restaurants, film halls and cars.
- THE POIGNANT POET & SINGER
Bengali men are brought up in an environment where poetry and rhyming phrases are how people talk. Even when he’s on the football ground and cursing the players, he does it in unmentionable poddos (poems). So when it comes to romance, a line here and there quoted from Jibanananda or Rabindranath is par for him. He is also the rare classically trained male who is in tune even in the bathroom. And you will probably be treated to lines from Othello when he is heartbroken….TO DIE UPON A KISS.
- THE DEEP EYES AND ELEGANT GAIT
A Bengali man may not be the fair tall handsome Punjabi munda, but the bespectacled shaggy haired dude is actually the owner of big, often drunken eyes that can melt your heart. A Bong boy will say more with his eyes over a glass of scotch than most men say over an entire night of lovemaking. He also possesses this unusual gait that shouts composure and a laid-back coolness – especially when dressed in their drool-worthy dhuti-punjabi or jeans-punjabi?
- GYAN & ANECDOTES
He has a ton of information (sometimes random & useless but never boring) & knowledge about almost everything. On a shopping spree you might suddenly be treated to the history of Coco Chanel or in the middle of dinner he might start explaining the meaning of different types of steaks. The Bengali man is a treasure trove of trivial, surreal, serious & funny facts & anecdotes. He always has a dada or kaka who has done the exact thing you are talking about. Never a boring moment around him & never again will you have to hunt for a conversation starter.
- FOOD LOVER
An old adage says that picky eaters make bad lovers & big eaters make great ones. Almost every Bengali man is, proudly, a KHADDO ROSHIK – a food lover & connoisseur of global cuisine. If it’s cooked well he’ll eat it, even if it’s a live snake in Vietnam. And that appetite, ladies & gentlemen, also converts to warm hugs & sweep-you-off-your-feet kind of love.
- THE RESPONSIBLE FRIEND IN NEED
Any woman who has ever gone out with a Bengali man will vouch for this – he is the quintessential pillar of responsibility and will always get you home safe. He likes the role of a caretaker & lover – he’ll get you your drink, he’ll walk you to your gate just cause your lane is dark & he’ll ask you to let him know once you reach home safe. Ekbar janiye dish…
- THE SMOOTH ANGER MANAGER
Often on the streets of Kolkata, you’ll see a Bong bhodromohila throwing an earth shattering tantrum with her man. And every single time, you’ll see the man trying his best to calm her down and talk sense into her, but with loving patience. The Bengali man knows how to tackle a woman in her shrew avatar. And he doesn’t give a flying f*** if the rest of the world thinks he’s a joru ka gulam – he’s not that and he knows how to love well.
- THE GREAT SHOPPER
While the rest of the male universe is killing itself complaining about how horrid an experience it is to go out shopping with a woman, the Bong bhodorolok is quietly doing his thing – taking his beloved to Chaitra sale and participating enthusiastically in choosing the best laal-par saree for her. The Bengali man is an asset on these trips, since, he is your forever present answer to the question – kemon dekhachche boloto? Fatafati!
- ADMIRER OF INTELLIGENCE & PERSONALITY
A Bengali man honestly believes the following lines of one of Rabindranath’s ballads – Rupe tomaye bholabo na (I won’t deceive you with my beauty). Though he likes admiring the super-hot specimens of the opposite sex, what he truly yearns for & respects is an original personality & a sparkling intelligence. He will always be more turned on by a deep conversation with a woman rather than her full pout.
- THE ORIGINAL OPEN-MINDED LIBERAL
Even though women’s lib is still a hot topic globally, Bengalis (majorly because of Ram Mohan Roy) have never have had to live in a society of unequals – men & women are treated as equals and most of the times Bong women come out on top (read Madhyamik & Uchcha-Madhyamik results). Hence, the Bengali man has absolutely zero ideas of discrimination or false insecurities about his woman. He is not going to be scandalised by or balk at his girlfriend/wife drinking, smoking, arguing or fighting or doing anything at par with a man. If you are not a Bengali, this is a pleasant change from the quintessential Indian male.
If ever there was a class of people who resembled Italians, then they are Bongs. They both love their afternoon naps, are big eaters & are passionate about every damn thing on earth. A Bengali man is equally passionate about football as he is about politics. And when this comes to romancing his belle, his passion sometimes creates a Devdas and at others an Uttam Kumar-esque romantic. Let his passions flare and you’ll probably have an insatiable & untiring lover for the rest of your life.
When Bollywood proclaimed “HANSI TO PHANSI”, the Bengali man was probably smiling knowingly. He is forever the funny guy who will always use self-deprecating sweet nothings to defuse your anger or sorrow. The subtlety of his humor is at times astonishing too.
- THE MULTILINGUA ANGREZ
A Bengali man, is often a throwback to the days of the Raj. He likes addressing women as ma’am & is often a great speaker & writer in English. This is an added bonus (debatably not something to be proud of) in a country where we still value people who can speak well in the Queen’s language. By the way, just because he is a fiery BANGREZ doesn’t mean he can’t speak in tongues – his Bengali is mellifluous & his Hindi is probably the SHUDDH version. And if he’s stayed anywhere in the south of India, he sure knows a smattering of Tamil & Kannada. After all, a Bengali man is a cunning linguist!
- THE INEBRIATED HISTRIONICS
You have to see a drunk Bong to believe it. A Bengali man loves his scotch. When high, he is the most entertaining and least menacing man around. He will get up on the barstool and, in clear tone & tune, either recite a poem or start singing Pink Floyd. Sit back and enjoy the show mademoiselle.
- THE SUBTLE GENTLEMAN COMPANION
The Bengali man always knows how to walk with you – when you’re in your short skirts on the way to Roxy or in a gorgeous dhakai on Ashtami. His subtle changes in handling you will floor you. He knows when to take a backseat and let you be in the limelight. He will let you be YOU. He will sit in a corner with a smile on his lips admiring you from afar.
- A CHEF
Most Bengali men are indulgent cooks & love playing the host. They love surprising everyone with exotic concoctions they cook up – beer battered pork chops, a Chicken-a-la Kiev, a tall glass of his special margarita & sangria combo? If you don’t mind the war zone that your kitchen looks like after he’s done with his experimentations, a Bong man is a surprisingly lovely chef & bartender to have around.
- THE INTELLECTUAL BIBLIOPHILE
Ever wondered what a Bengali man’s DVD collection, his bookshelf & his wall look like? They are chock full of Kurosawa movies, Hemingway novels & posters of the Bridge Over River Kwai. His favorite movies are probably all black & white. If you are a book lover, you will enjoy every discussion with him – he is extremely well read in at least two languages. A Bengali man seeks depth & intellectual gravity in all he perceives. You will be exposed to some of the most exotic works of art in his presence & he will never come across as the slovenly beer drinking, WWE poster on the wall, Chetan Bhagat reading slob – he’s a sharp & witty appreciator of art & culture.
Puchu, pinku, poltu, panchu, shontu, rontu & babu – though funny as hell, all of these are common nicknames for Bengali men. Imagine having a lover whom you can lovingly call “MY DEAR LALTU” in private. Hilarity is never missing in a Bengali man’s presence.
- LOVER NOT A FIGHTER
Bengali men are often disparaged as effeminate, non-fighting weaklings. Please know this once and for all – he may not be the punching, kicking hero of a Bollywood flick, but he will always stand up for his partner. And anyone who has been at the receiving end of an angry Bong man’s wrath knows that not all fights are won with fists – some are simply silenced with words & attitude. If he is still faced with an angry brute he is well capable of belittling his opponent with his wit and making sure that he comes out the victor without throwing a single punch. If you know a Bengali man called Sourav Ganguly then you’ll know what we mean!
Thus, the final word – in case you have a Bengali bhadralok holding your hand right now or a good looking Bong chokra trying to woo you with Robi Thakur’s poetry, please turn around and give them a hug & know that you have chosen well!
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